Now don't go misunderstanding me here folks. I'm new here so be gentle yeah?

"I agree global warming is happening." Thats got that out of the way!

What I disagree with is the explanations coming from the scientific bodies. There are so many lies, some of them quite huge, coming from the western governments that I find it impossible to believe anything until I have researched and found arguments from the pro's and anti's, then come to my own rational conclusions.
I do hope my questions will be answered sensibly and not just shot down as dribble coming from an idiot....we aint all rocket scientists!!

Let me start by asking about a very confusing issue, to me anyway.
There's a reporter from an American news crew on tv recently telling us about the ice shelf behind him which is breaking off. The guy has ice on his eyelashes and around his mouth and is wearing a jacket 6 inches thick. I asked a scientist how the ice shelf could possibly be melting and breaking off when the temperatures in that region are minus 30 for 8 months of the year. He replied that melted water seeps down through the ice causing cracks over a very long time period.
Now what I can't understand is: 1/ Where does the melt water come from? If its on the surface then how does it manage to seep anywhere as it would instantly freeze as soon as it left the surface, so how can it retain its heat for long enough or until its seeped to a level where it can continue to form a crack? This same argument does not appear to apply to the glaciers around Mt Everest where daytime temperatures far exceed anything recorded in the Arctic\Antarctic but where the ice remains frozen.

Pack ice is pack ice because its impenetrable due to the lack of air bubbles. It takes a lot of melting, thats why icebergs can float around in the warmer ocean currents for months if not years before melting.
I can understand how the cracks could appear over time if there were volcanic activity underneath the ice but the scientists would spot this from satellite and seismology data wouldn't they? Fault lines? Someone would spot this!
I have a theory that stray microwaves are being caught up in the earths magnetic field and pulled down onto the poles where they are acting like a huge microwave oven and internally melting the ice sheets. Sound ridiculous? Why not? The fastest warming has been in the last 25 years, since mobile phones and microwave ovens etc., have been in use?? It would explain how the ice could melt internally to cause cracks in such a short space of time without the need for an external melt-water source! Lets face it stray microwaves are not in short supply as any radio astronomer will tell you!

2/ Very rarely do I see water vapour mentioned in arguments about global warming. Considering it accounts for 95% of all greanhouse gasses surely it should be included in analysis?? Don't forget that if it were not for the water vapour in the atmos' the earth would be a far cooler place to live due to its heat trapping capabilities which can be witnessed on cloudy and clear nights in winter when the difference in temperature can be significant.

There now. That was painless. Its the little details I need explaining before I commit myself to one camp or the other. At the moment I'm securely nailed to the fence! Too many contradictions!

Its pointless handing out equations and talking trillions of cubic metres blah di blah when the simple science going on outside your kitchen window seems to contradict what we are being told.